You kissed me, on your parents couch, so tenderly and yet so forcefully. My head was spinning and I'm not sure if it was because of the drinks we had just had or the attraction I felt for you. I met you in the most embarrassing  way. Blew you off for a few weeks and ran into you in public, at that point I had no reason to not see you. We went for drinks, something I never did, talked for hours, went back to your house but I was adamant on not sleeping with you. I was certain there would not be a second date, you and I made no sense. The alternative weird girl from high school going out with a flirtatious egotistic player ? We made no sense, and maybe we still don't. Our interest differ but we have similar qualities and sometimes the same way of thinking. I knew I could and probably would get screwed over but I was infatuated with you. Your confidence, your ambition, your soft side, your impulsiveness and you were yourself. I didn't feel pressured to do anything I didn't want to do, something I could honestly say I hadn't felt. It didn't take long for me to fall in love. It wasn't a fairytale love story and that's what I love the most, it was real, natural, and unforced. It just happened. I knew you were the person I wanted to struggle with, to succeed with, build with and simply spend my life with. You are the love of my life. You are the most insanely frustrating person, difficult to please and ill-tempered person, and yet I can't imagine my life without you, or more so I don't want to. Staying in this small town for the rest of my life doesn't seem so bad with you by my side. I found someone who doesn't disgust me, who I don't cringe when they show affection or no matter how mad I am at you I still want to be around you. The love I have for you is great and all consuming. It's been fast there is no doubt about that and it wont be easy but I've never been one for the easy route. I've never been so scared to lose someone, to give everything I have to that person, be selfless and simply enamored. Marriage, children and growing old with you is all I want, even when you're being a complete ass. Though I often wonder if all the arguments, the headaches and insecurities are worth it. I'm losing so much but am I gaining more? The rejection I've felt from my family is something I never thought I would feel, and now I wonder are you worth losing the relationship of my mother and the receiving the criticism of my family? There is no compromise just one extreme to another. I give you up and be okay with my family or stay and struggle to have a relationship with them.